Creating a Healthy Relationship with Social Media
“He’s vacationing again!”
“They are always eating at fine dining restaurants!”
“She just bought that new bag!”
Do you ever feel that other people’s lives are always more exciting? Scrolling through your phone endlessly for hours past midnight only to be exhausted by lack of sleep, pressure, and self-doubt.
In this digital age where social media becomes an overwhelming force of information, everyone wants to put out the best versions of themselves. Whether it's living a lavish lifestyle or showing off materialistic goods, there is one common message: “You’re not good enough!”
Hello, Habits: A Minimalist’s Guide to a Better Life by Fumio Sasaki states: “Let me teach you a way to instantly make you unhappy - comparing yourself with others” Even though this is not what social media was originally created for, it has become an medium that magnifies comparison between people.
From a psychology and physiology point of view, social media notifications, especially likes, are designed to make our brains produce dopamine, a chemical that makes us feel happy and rewarded. This in turn makes us want to constantly check our social media so we get the instant gratification from receiving messages, views, likes etc.
The amount of information we receive on a daily basis can be as high as 36,000 GB, which is 5 times more than that of 1980! But we as human beings are not meant to absorb this much information all at once!
The information overload and abuse of social media has led to more stress. In a study, sleep deprivation, depression, and anxiety are on the rise for adolescents - all because of social media. This toxic cycle is further exacerbated by its easy accessibility.
Have you considered what life would be like if there are no social media, no smartphones, and no electronics? We don’t need to be this extreme in reducing our social media usage, but limiting on how much time we spend on there can greatly improve our quality of life.
Turn Off Notifications
Turning off notifications is the best way to regain control of time. The majority of messages and notifications don’t necessarily require our immediate attention. Mute unnecessary group chats and turn off superfluous social media notifications so we can focus on what is important instead.
When we have control of time, we can focus completely at the present moment.
At Soul Barn, we implement methods to limit our dependence on our smartphones. We encourage everyone to connect with those around us at the moment by using a phone lock box. We aim to create a safe space uninterrupted by our smartphones so we can all immerse in the experience together.
Choose who you follow carefully, leave out toxic relationships
Who and what accounts we follow can be inspirational and knowledgeable. Spend some time filtering and deleting meaningless accounts to protect our peace.
Keep in mind the contents that make us feel unsafe, anxious, fearful, and jealous - we don’t want these contents to affect us. The power to follow these accounts are in our own hands.
If toxicity is among our friends, mute them on social media. This will avoid the awkwardness between friends if removing them from our contacts occurs.
Everyone’s time and energy are finite. Just as in relationships, choose the ones that show positivity and good vibes to show respect for ourselves.
Develop Social Media Sensitivity
News outlets can be a source of negativity as well - whether it’s celebrity gossip, scandals or dramas. Because of how the algorithm operates, news media will constantly feed us with contents that are frequently watched. With a special method, we can change how algorithms promote different contents.
We can choose to engage with credible news sources, reject contents with clickbait headlines, and avoid liking negative news. Refer to our friends for current events or important info to assess the validity of the information.
Watch out for these tips when selecting a credible news outlet:
Is the information from a reliable and objective new outlet?
Are credits given to editors?
Is this sponsored content?
Be sure to use these tips when assessing whether the news source is credible. Over time, our dwindling consumption of negative news will make us happier and healthier - so that we can spend more time with those who are important to us.
Set Time and Objective
Time always flies by whenever we are using our smartphones that we end up neglecting our own responsibilities. To overcome this, we can set our intention first before using our smartphones. For example: “Search up vacationing spots - 30 minutes” or “Reply to messages - 10 minutes”.
Feel free to also use features available in our phones to practice better time management. For example, set Instagram usage to 1 hour and when the time comes, a notification will sound.
Less is More
Reorganize apps on our phones to limit social media overuse. For example, set a nice, clean wallpaper as a background on the first page so our eyes are not overwhelmed by messy apps.
Place all the practical apps (ex: Maps, Notes, Calculator) on the second page and social media, gaming apps on the last page. This will help limit entertainment and social media exposure to a minimum. Place apps that we want to use more on the first few pages such as meditation, bookkeeping, or even language learning apps.
Additionally, we can also put our smartphones away from our sight. For example, place the smart phone in the bedroom while being in the living room or turn on airplane mode before sleeping and place the smartphone outside of the bedroom. I personally love this method because there is now more time to stretch and look at the beautiful view outside.
Create Positivity
It is important to be self-aware when detoxing from social media. Some people may feel empty after cutting social media cold turkey, leaving an unfillable void in their daily lives. We can overcome this by setting a clear objective and intention so that we can feel accomplished without social media’s validity.
List out all the things you want to do but didn’t have a chance to. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant, it can be simply looking out the window, reading a book, taking a short walk outside, or even learning to pour over coffee.
I usually jot down the joyful feeling when doing such activities: “the flowers all bloomed so beautifully outside today!” or “I finally realized that coffee smells the best when it is brewing!” Writing down even small observations like this help us gravitate towards positivity and appreciation. We will then feel a sense of accomplishment from ourselves rather than on social media.
At Soul Barn, we practice these exercises to help us be more intune with our peace of mind. Go have a day off and spend more time with family and friends - whether it is traveling, camping, or hiking - these are all activities to help us be less dependent on social media for our own source of happiness.
Let us find our inner peace step by step.
About the Author
Alma enjoys music, science, and creative things.
She enjoys hiking with her family, or trying out new recipes in the kitchenon the weekends.
Recently she’s started practicing Qi Gong and Tai Chi.
Currently seeking exciting outside the box experiences.
Article translate by Victor Su
